Its alright........i'll be ok

I sat in the physician's office with my dad, he'd just been going downhill for some time, and finally he knew he just had to understand the reasons for his physical failings.
Following some brief but revealing simple tests, the doctor advised admission to the hospital. As we waited for the doctor to make arrangements… I looked at dad and said…"well, finally we'll get to the bottom of this".. Dad replied, "aw, I'll probably croak there." I just said "Naw, you can't, I need you too much'"…he grabbed my hand tight for as weak as he was, and said, " I need you too"….with his weak tired smile...

Once at the hospital, the more doctors that came, the less I liked what I heard. Recounting the last 2 months and more of how he had just went downhill in my mind, plus knowing the investigative procedures they were planning on doing, added to some information one physician just happened to leave out in 2007, some very shocking information.

I watched as the tech did a procedure on dad. He lay so quiet and still. I thought to myself," dad, I really do need you, I'm not ready to let go, you have to hang with me".

And then I took another look….I saw a body, nothing but skin and bones, his face as white as the sheets, drifting off to sleep, as he does thru out the day….but is dad ready?…is he ready to go?….is he just too tired?
Its time Janice…time…to let go and say…"It's alright…I'll be ok, I'll take good care of mom."